Therapy for Families

Online in Montana & In-person in Missoula

You don’t know exactly how it got this bad,
but here you are.

No one is communicating in a healthy way to each other. When they do talk, it immediately devolves into a squabbling fight.

The tension doesn’t subside until after everyone blows up and doors slam.

Or maybe it’s quiet in your home. Too quiet. You can’t get a word out of your kids, who come home and head to their room and shut the door. You can’t get them to DO anything, and you and your spouse disagree on how to handle it.

There are so many things unsaid. An elephant in the room? Try a whole herd!
You’ve tried to get them to talk to each other. You’ve got the books, and you’ve vented to your friends. But you’re secretly terrified about where this is headed if things don’t change.

Maybe you’re noticing:

  • Blame. A lot of blame, and it’s focused on one person usually

  • Snarky, sarcastic remarks thrown back and forth

  • Defensive behavior, comments, and postures

  • Misunderstandings, and no room to clear them up

  • A lack of laughter, affection, joy, and fun

What if it could shift? Without blame or shame, and with FUN!

There are so many dynamics at play in families!

So many below-conscious patterns that go on, as well as some very real changes in each of our communication styles, mindsets and behaviors that can affect the family as a whole.

Any time the members of a family are willing to even walk in a room to begin the process of becoming vulnerable in those ways, things can shift for the better.

I don’t focus on just one person in family therapy.

In a family, even if there’s a single person that seems to be the “problem,” I don’t see it that way.  With the exception of domestic violence or substance abuse, which would need to be addressed first, all family members contribute to the state the family is in when they enter my office, to a greater or lesser degree.

There is no shame in this! I don’t judge, or blame a family for their conflict, fears, worries, patterns or irritations or angers! We all carry a LOT of behind-the-scenes emotional “stuff” and I ensure I create a safe space for you and your family to be open and vulnerable.

Together, we can help your family evolve.

Therapy with your family will take some commitment. There will be some moments it will be challenging. But some times we will be silly, play games, and not be “heavy” at all.

Imagine feeling close and connected to your child again. Think what it will be like to see your spouse and your teen grin at each other, after really seeing each other, and your teen feeling deeply understood for the first time in…forever?

Let’s get your family back on track.
Call now for a free 20-minute consultation to see if we are a good fit for each other.

Family Therapy

Family Therapy involves the whole family. Participants usually are over age 8, but most commonly are 11+ and can include multiple young people, single parent household, foster or kinship household, or blended families.

You will all have a chance to discuss what is on your mind, and the therapists job is to help you learn ways to state your thoughts and feelings in non-defensive, clear ways and to set appropriate boundaries and have reasonable expectations with each other. Hopefully, in the process, we will bring some fun back into your household!

What we’ll work on

Family Therapy can help you:

  • Learn healthy ways of communicating

  • Advocate for yourself if you do too much or lack boundaries

  • Foster deeper connections with each other

  • Develop understanding and perspectives for each of your family members

  • Learn healthy boundaries, how to set and keep them

  • How to have healthy conflict

  • Bring joy into your family

Your family has so much potential!

I’M HERE TO SUPPORT YOU IN EMBRACING THAT.

FAQS

Common questions about family therapy

  • If the rest of you can come, do that, and keep trying to get the outlier to come. Maybe after they see and experience the positive changes, they will. We can also start with having them join over telehealth or phone or FaceTime at first. Baby steps.

  • It depends on your goals, the complexities of what you are brining, the number of people in your family...

    In general, consider six months to be average.

    However I have a few families that continue ongoing after they feel stable because it's worth it to them to have a regular check-in time to invest in their family.

  • I see all sorts of families for all sorts of reasons.

    Adults with older parents navigating role changes, a combination of relatives after the death of the matriarch, grandparents wanting to develop better parenting skills before their grandchild is born...